Ruff Golden, BREAKING NEWS!!!!!!!!!!!! Photos have just arrived at Fox News Headquarters that show the evil effects of these criminals and the extent they will risk to satisfy their greed...our news staff has turned over to authorities a note which was attached to this picture and had certain demands. If these demands were not met (on time), a future picture would be forth coming, and it would not be pretty!!!!!! Commander Tony has put his Task Force on 24/7 alert and no expense is too much for the safe return of Miss Octopussy and the capture of these dangerous criminals. How they were able to penetrate the security perimeters of the Castle's defenses is a mystery. The latest and most secure alarms in the industry have been installed at the Castle to safe-guard our guests according to Miss Emily. In an exclusive glimpse of the demand note, this reporter saw a 24 hour window in which the criminals' next requests would be forth coming. This could be devastating for everyone involved!!!!! No other news organization in the world will keep you informed as FOX NEWS, so stay tuned to your local affiliates for any breaking developments.
...Ruff Golden, Fair and Balanced Reporter.
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